The rescue

I just finished reading a book called the Rescue by Nicholas Sparks. from the outside its looks like any other love story, But the way the author has bought to light some of the ways of relationships and their take on commitments... its so touching!

The way Denise talks about her son kyle to Taylor..(obviously the hunk hehhe) is so raw that you can feel her frustration, anger, helplessness and love in just that one page. its soo... downright touching that it brings tears to your eyes.. that too to me who is so cynical in life.

It brings me back to the topic of my thought process for today on how lots of us like the act of rescuing.. personally I love to play the mother hen to everybody, to lend a shoulder to my Friends or to bring a smile on someone's face. I guess it rises from the fact of being needed.. being indispensable as a friend or a sister or a daughter. If i think about it deeper is this the sole motive that gives rise to the passion that i have for working with kids? Do i crave for gratitude or do i like feeling dependent?

I wanted so badly to teach kids, not as a volunteer, not part time but spend he whole time with them, to teach them whats right, to educate them, to be a mentor. I even touch based with a school for the poor but chickened out last minute.. why? the age old reason... MONEY!!
teaching doesn't pay everyone knows that, but something as fancy as MBA or IT does.

what was it that was attractive for me to teach kids. is the feeling of martyrdom or i really love those kids.. i honestly cant figure out.

I keep wondering how do people actually choose between passion and liabilities. i know that a lot of people say that if you do something that you are passionate about, the money will follow soon.. but its such a scary thought. what if it doesn't follow, wont it will end up killing your passion.

Today i heard something about angel therapy... something about archangel and angel sitting on either shoulder of ours and one telling you whats good and one propagates evil (though i think they don't really propagate evil but propagates reality)
I am currently trying to figure out who is telling me to quit my job is the angel or my archangel!!!

i wonder if i will ever get the guts to do something that i am passionate about.. without having to wonder about my bank balance or luxuries in life. maybe one day when one of my angels voice is really LOUD.....